But I Am Not You: July 2013

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

I see you with my heart. I desire you with my thoughts. I wis you well this day and every day. You know I thought about you Saturday night. for a lot a circumstances in my life right now, I have to choose various other days. Know this I keep you in mind always. So many times, I ponder the thought of things to do so as not just to jump up and down about what we need to do. I have solutions, and I never sing off with out sharing one or sometimes more. They are just basic human everyday things to tend to the needs and rights of others. We can not exist here alone. we need people. Yes there are times when I just want to go and hide. to put everything and everybody out of my sight. Out of my ears. No, it last such a short time, but honestly those seconds do exist in me, the lover of all people. I'm one of those ones who puts off Christmas shopping until the 24th of December. I love it, and I do it on purpose, just to be near all those people, wow, what a treat. Its a time when I get to touch someone who had no intention on touching someone such that I am.LOL. y\You know what? and sometimes I do, I lol. Bargans,yes, but the best of all is the Christmas feeling I get. I get to touch people in mass. One of my greatest desires in life. Crazy huh? I told you I am crazy. I'm crazy in love with you. My people, my unseen public. What a thought. Do you know how many young people have thoughts such as this? Graffito, all over every thing. All kinkds of confirurations and all kinds of messsages. Some of it , most of it is so very beautiful. Of course ther is danger in over kill. mMuch of it is written to send the establishment a message, some, ment to be art an expression, a belief, a destiny, even a way out, of what ever. do you undersand whereI'm going? No I never did it. Nor would I ever. I'm from another place in time. where we learned how to speak piglatin and cuss you out while some floks just thought we were so cute with those cute little nothing words. We knew exactly what we were saying. If you were slow, too bad, your whole family just got run down. Who am I talking to to night? You needed to read what I just wrote. Perhaps you were one of those. I was. Youth come in all kinds of packaging. This is what out society has taught. The SERVIVAL OF THE FITTEST. I get so upset with the educational system of rewards. The teach students to lie and steal. Some of our greatest minds are lost to the streets becausof their IQ according to a test written and required by the elite, not genus, money. Power. And so we turn out what is taught to middle of the road. Most of the society can not read or write. Count .Yes, that is business, sporst, music, building, machanics, science medcine all controlled by the elite. Money. Under bridges , how to blow a city up is taught and lesrned, by someone who was expell from school in the 9th grade. Who knew more than the teacher. You know I'll telling the truth. One of them may have been you. Your mamma had a day job, no dad in sight, you usually had no lights in the house to study, and the kids thoght you were weird because you went to the library after school. But still. No one called your name when graduation day came. know any one like that? I have know many. They usually wast out on this planet doning something they usually don't even care any more, what that something is. Look what we have done! It can be corrected. If it was you, you know a way, share it. Someone somewhere will listen. Not only listen but act on your behalf. Not on so such just for you ,but for those out there who are are suffering as you did. This is how we make his world a better place. one person at a time. One day at a time. We can, we must. Next time I will share how we make the middle of the roaders, liers and cheats. Hum. I may even define you. Maybe not, because you read what I write. Until then, I'll keep you in my prayers and I'll love you with every thought (**)

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

I'm here and its not Saturday night. I'm so blessed you are here. Thank you again. I have started placing my inteviews on my blogg site. I truly hope you enjoy them. I've done 6 now. there will be another one the first of the week #2 of my friend Dr. Williams. I've known her for a while, she is a wonderful person. Well I'm in good shape after this trimatic decision. I'm still shaking my head. Oh but I'm also doing the most powerful thing. Watching and praying. praying and watching. We'll get through this. I'm not sad, I'm angry. Not at people so much, but at the existing evil the continues to invade my presence on this planet! I'm done with it! I've declared all out war on evil! I'm not just telling you. I have premission to do exactly what I was sent to do. Some of you may remember, I have told about the fact that at the end of my freshma year in college I. was married. Not because I was pregnant, but because i was so loved and in love, I just could't helpe it. We lived hundreds of miles away from each other. My mother was strict. very much so . I was worse that she, I knew I was supose to wait. well I was 18 and waiting, for this 31 year old man. He got me. Took me home... Now that is enough of that story. Before the end of his life in 2012. he gave some advice on how to live, I listened. It was lovely. Not long ago, this year in fact, (2013), I realized I'm free. Really free for the first time in my life. I went from my mothers home to my husbands home. Now I'm at home. I desire to travel the world with my message of hope. I write all the time. Now, search for people, reading books, people want me to read for interviews an nuonces to probe the minds of people with a message. We are really alike in a wonderful kind of way. I like it. In fact I love it. I'm a people person. I love love people, I really do. Back to my realization. I want to be free, just for me. I once thought I wanted to be attached again but ,no, its too soon. So now my age, I'm blessed, really Blessed. Since my discovery, I'm 18, going on 71. I was 18 when I married. I no nothing about not being married. I want to know. and I do and I'll even learn more. I remember being 18, yes and all the rest. but 18 is special for me. I'm 70. Do't look it and I did not do it. The gift was given by my Creator YAH. I don't feel like it and I sure do not smeel like it. Older people seem to develope a certain smell. I don't smell, my house does not smell, Thank God.LOL.I do not act my age, never intend to. My youngest child who is 40, calls me his wild mamma. I am, I'm wild, and in love with who YAH Created me to hang with, you. I hope you love me too. Its not always easy, but its fun to try. I say what I want, usually. However it is always in regards to the well being of someone else. People are not to be trampled upon! Only things at some times. I still listen to rapp music. really rapp is basicly the for form of the trans message system. It tells a story. I hear all of these stories, I'm still shaking my head, not to the beat, and most of them are very nice, but I'm shaking my head to the words they are saying. and even the ones they were to hurt to say and that is usually a huh sound. I hear more thand sounds and the music I hear the hurt . I hear and feel the pain. The beat is the cover up. The more exquisite the more intense the drama, the detestation. I get it after the first two words. I heard one tha started with' I hate you I love you.' That simply means I hate you because- and it plays through out the song. The correct term for rappers are minsterial (an instrument). Messager, one who delivers, or tells. They usually had beautiful voices, and gifted to do what they did. The ones I've heard so far are very gifted. I will listen to more. When I return , you know where I'm going wwith this right back to the daily news in my life, he miss treatment of youth on this planet and where it is going! You know, you said it, let's look for better, and live the same. I love you with the heart of an 18 year old , who knows where she is going. See you ,Love you be safe come back carefully(**)